Some Life In Pictures

my newest addiction!

Fixin to clean rings in Nashville

enjoying Nashville with some pizza and football!

the batman building in Nashville

after a hard day of work....at my dads...

i love my new curling wand

ive missed you +Crimson Cup . Enjoying breakfast before work.

4 day weekend.

Dirt track races = dirt in your eyes...face...hair.  next time remember hat.

The hardest part & happiest days.

I had mix emotions about this month. So many heartbreaking memories. First sound of a heartbeat & the day my dreams faded away.
Somehow I managed to get through it. I surrounded myself around uplifting positive people. The days I was sad... I made sure I smiled the most. Will this work the day of the mc? Not sure but I'm going to try.

My bday was spent at cedar point. Tho it rained the first 1.5 hours...we managed to play like kids.yes in the rain & arcade. A lot of people left the park due to the rain but it cleared up and was beautiful out. We didn't wait that long for any ride. June & AJ... thank you for making my day special. You have no idea how much it ment to me.

I also had a great time on a party bus..which started the epic week.& the following Saturday was a get together at my dads. I drank a lot and don't remember parts of the night.vodka!

Work has been going good. More hours and hopefully a car soon. I'm headed to Knoxville TN for a bridal show. Ill get home Sunday around 2am & work at the pharmacy at 9 am. I can do this! I think.

Carissa is back! Life fuller now & memories to be made. Today was lunch and a movie

.

Good bye July!

July started off pretty stressful but alas, it all turned around.
I found joy in riding my bike. I started riding with my brother and June but then I got it in my head to trek to work.. 5 miles each way! I get to pass through a wonderful park and often seen deer and other wildlife. I usually leave a bit earlier then I must so I can take joy in the ride instead of being rushed.
I plan on doing this as much as possible ( non rainy days). I also am starting insanity.  
We will discuss that later ;) 


My pt job took me to St Louis. I had the best sleep Ive had in awhile and made great money for a one day show. I get to travel often and I just wish I had time to explore the cities im in. The life of a rock star!


As my brain keeps reminding me of certain days coming up, I fight the depression. Aug 6th... first time I heard Zechs heart beat and of course, the end of the month... when I lost him. I am trying to find postive and up lifting ways to distract myself. I know I have to survive these days and really... Im just taking it one day at a time. Its all I can do.


Im ready for the end of Summer...

a game made by my step sissy's hubby. its called aggravation. i haven't played but its fun to watch. think of it like an adult sorry.

part of my beautiful ride to work. love putting on my headphones and cruising through wild wood park.

this young buck was actually close to me. i didnt think to take a pic till he walked away! On the side was a bigger, more intimidating buck...i was like ok, time to go!

had an ok night out with my friend. i thought it was what i wanted. it was fun but really i just like being at home with my nextflix and good company.

my beautiful niece K! she offered to paint my toes. shes such a loving and giving girl. Sure missed her!

What a fun day! June & I walked to Cold Stone then later that eve we all headed out for a bike ride then we enjoyed green tea with lemon and watched a movie. <3 my family!

St Louis Bridal Show. It was fun. I made good money. Beautiful weather. Just wish I could of explored!

Rainy weather

Please enroll me in the The Walking Dead banwagon. One episode annnnnd I was hooked. I had my own netflix marathon. So I'm all caught up for October.

I had a nice weekend. Plenty of smiles. Carissa is gone for the summer. It has been raining for weeks now (as my hard worked tan is fading) and this weekend was no different.

Got to tour the art museum again and watch a glass blowing demo. I'm a happy chick and that's all I can say right now.

Aunt Keen

Ive tried to write this blog multiple times, yet.... I cant seem.to find the words.

I got a text from a friend saying my aunt was trying to reach me. I called the number assuming it was my aunt kathleen. As soon as I heard my aunt jans voice, I knew something was wrong. My heart melted of the news of my aunti keens passing. I have plans on spending sometime in bay city this summer & was looking forward to spending time with her. Her passing was very unexpected & no good byes were spoke but I have faith that she knows how much she ment to me.
*im so glad im "home"*
   I was given some of her jewlery.& her jewlery stand. But as I look at it... Its nothing compared to having her here.
    Theres a purple bracelet that I remember complimenting her on years ago. We were sitting in church. Her, my gram & I. Those memories I will cherish for the rest of my life.
   My family may not be the closest or most expressive but the memories I have are priceless. I just feel blessed.
This year I expected to be a mom. & so far 2013 has given me nothing but heart break.... Yet some how im at peace & feeling wiser.

sn: I know my aunt is smiling down at me. I know shes with Jesus, my grandparents & my precious baby boy... If any chance heaven has blogger... Dear aunti please pass out hugs & kisses and please place a kiss on Zechariahs forehead for me. I love you & will live my life so I can join you one day.

Its like its Summer.

Life has been going. That is all I can say. I never really know what to expect from each day. I try to get out and enjoy the sun, the pool and the loved ones around me. Part of me aches to be back in Oklahoma, but as much as I can click my heels and wish for the days of... I know it will never happen. I toyed with the idea once or twice since its been officially over but today...I pretty much got my answer from God. I mean I know what I'm supposed to do. I get that but I didn't take my vows lightly no matter the shit we went through. Sooo there's that.... Time for me.

Work has been going as well. I am pretty much comfortable with the operations of the job, just not pronouncing a lot of the medicine.  Seriously  why is everything a tongue twister???  I take my test to be officially a level 1 Pharmacy Technician  next week. Pray for me. They tell me its easy and I hope I do not prove them wrong!

Heres to the frozen drinks with whipped cream.

Heres to the tears. Heres to the laughter.

Heres to the ones who really matter.

A peach Bellini. So Delish.

Wallaby walk about at the Toledo zoo

Coldstone with Carissa. Our last "date" before she went away for the summer. Mine is full of fruit!

Me in my Tech coat...oh yea baby!

INDEED

 

Good times

Yesterday I waited for Carissas arrival from camp. She had a blast & was so very much excited....

We all kind of layed around since the skies were grey. Id rather of layed around in the pool.

We ended up walking to starbucks for snacks and joanns for crafts.

Im starting an S wall & she is going to be doing her name.

A walk to remember.

One reason why I love Toledo: The trees. There are trees everywhere & alot of parks.
My friend & I took a stroll/hike yesterday. I havent been there in years. Last time was 2nd grade! Flash backs overwhelmed me as I crossed the wooden swinging bridge. (which was alot more adventurous back then)I looked up through the tall trees and just felt God. I felt thats where im supposed to be.

As for the beautiful scenery, we seen lots of deer. And got to lay eyes upon a baby deer that still.had shakey legs as it ran behind its mother.

Me day.

Today was very beautiful out. I could not stay inside so I ventured out to Barns and Noble/Starbucks. I found a book by one of my favs *Walter Mosley*. I enjoyed a nice chi latte and a blondie. But more importantly the walk was so soul cleansing. I needed today.

Later on in the eve my friend brang me a sweet mothers day card that made me cry, again soul cleansing.